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| I know, what was I thinking, right? |
I'm happy, I'm content, now my life makes perfect sense - but I was completely wrong.
I lay in bed, thinking about you all night. Are we on the same page? As I think about you, I always see that crooked smile. A smile I love. A smile that's like a key to a secret door that only kindred spirits could enter.
But now I feel so alone. I never thought someone could possibly feel this grief. Can I endure all this agony? I should've expected right from the start - no, I should've restrained myself from you. No man will ever take me seriously. I mean, what was I thinking - presuming anything from you?
I tried to perceive that excruciating feeling you made me feel. But you lost me there. My mind was hiding in the shadows. I held the blackness of nonexistence at bay by inches. My heart was sinking in the ocean of sorrows. I'm not Atlas, but it seems that the world is pressing down on me. Is this how if feels to be emotionally spurned?
I tried to contemplate on what you were saying. But I couldn't bare it. I listened hard. Something sharper than knives ripped through me—the words, making sense in spite of the other anguish.
Reality had come on so fast.
And, for a never-ending space, that was all there was. Just the fiery torture. Nothing else, not even time. So that made it infinite, with no beginning and no end. One infinite moment of pain.
The pain was bewildering.
Let me die, let me die, let me die.
How long had passed? Seconds or minutes? Numb. I couldn’t feel. I still couldn’t see, either, but I could hear.
But I know myself better than that! I know that this numbing feeling will pass. What's there to hold on to? So now I'd like to believe that time will heal.
Hopefully.
I lay in bed, thinking about you all night. Are we on the same page? As I think about you, I always see that crooked smile. A smile I love. A smile that's like a key to a secret door that only kindred spirits could enter.
But now I feel so alone. I never thought someone could possibly feel this grief. Can I endure all this agony? I should've expected right from the start - no, I should've restrained myself from you. No man will ever take me seriously. I mean, what was I thinking - presuming anything from you?
I tried to perceive that excruciating feeling you made me feel. But you lost me there. My mind was hiding in the shadows. I held the blackness of nonexistence at bay by inches. My heart was sinking in the ocean of sorrows. I'm not Atlas, but it seems that the world is pressing down on me. Is this how if feels to be emotionally spurned?
I tried to contemplate on what you were saying. But I couldn't bare it. I listened hard. Something sharper than knives ripped through me—the words, making sense in spite of the other anguish.
Reality had come on so fast.
And, for a never-ending space, that was all there was. Just the fiery torture. Nothing else, not even time. So that made it infinite, with no beginning and no end. One infinite moment of pain.
The pain was bewildering.
Let me die, let me die, let me die.
How long had passed? Seconds or minutes? Numb. I couldn’t feel. I still couldn’t see, either, but I could hear.
But I know myself better than that! I know that this numbing feeling will pass. What's there to hold on to? So now I'd like to believe that time will heal.
Hopefully.
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